Week 3, yeehaw

HELLO HELLO FROM PERU!
Another fab week in paradise. Peru is just getting better and better.
How was Easter?! All the latinos here think that the American
traditions are just SO strange. One of the latinos said, “Why bunnies?
Why eggs? Why are they hidden?” Haha, I realized that I have no idea
why. It´s so funny, I love America.
The CCM is good, very good. SO much learning in one day, it’s a 16
hour day of basically going to school, teaching, service, more school,
learning about the gospel, work out, eat sleep. And your just ALWAYS
trying to get the most of it. You know how on the garden hose there’s
usually the “jet” setting that makes the water come out super fast?
Well, the CCM is kind of like drinking from the jet hose. You still
get water in your mouth, but it really hurts your face sometimes.
That’s my #analogybyaddy for the day, thank you thank you.
This week, all the Latinas that we have had for the last 3 weeks
headed out on their different missions. All the native spanish
speakers are only in the CCM for 3 weeks, and so we had to say goodbye
to them all on Monday. My heart just broke for them to leave, because
they are my BFF’s. No seriously. As I watched the bus that they all
packed into drive away, I cried tears of love, because they are going
to change lives, and be the best missionaries South America has ever
seen. WE all sang God be with you till we meet again in spanish
together before they left.
Also, this week one of the Elders in our zone went home. It broke all
of our hearts, because we wanted him to be out serving with us, but he
had to do what was best for him and I respect that.
On Thursday, I was feeling more homesick than ever. I missed my family
and my friends and was just thinking, “Man, my life was WAY easy
before this, and my family is the best, and I just took it all for
granted”. I just thought, “how easy would it be to be home or at BYU
Idaho right now?”. It would be a lot easier for me, that’s for sure.
BUT. That day when we all watched our friend catch the plane home back
to America, my heart was just so full of gratitude for the opportunity
I have to be here in Peru, and I don´t want to come home. Haha, I love
it so much here, and like I’ve said before, it’s already the hardest
thing I’ve ever done in my life, but you know what? It’s hard for
everyone. All of us missionaries have talked together, and  I’ve
realized, “hey Hermana Clark, it isn’t just you”. It’s made me toughen
up a lot more, you know like “rub a lil dirt on it” like Papa says?
Also, this week Hermana Haws (mi compañera) and I were called to be
the Sister Leaders here at the CCM, which I am pumped about.  All the
new sisters came today, and they are so sweet and cute and SO ready,
and so we are like the little mother hens of all the hermanas here in
the CCM, the latinas and the americanos, :)The CCM is a teeny-tiny in
comparison to the Provo Missionary Training Center, there’s only about
60 missionaries here I’d say right now.
I AM SO EXCITED FOR GENERAL CONFERENCE, I cant even explain. I loved
General Conference before the mission, but this love is like a
completely different level. I am so excited to hear the prophet speak.
(and because we have general conference, we dont have classes on
Saturday, wahoo!)
We play so much futbol here, we play every day. Two days ago, I had a
hat trick, and YES I know what that means. Pretty soon David Beckham
is going to be calling me and inviting me to dinner parties at his
house, and we’ll play a little one-on-one. ;)
Spanish lesson of the week. Alright class, pescado=fish. It’s usually
dead fish, like in the form that you eat. And then peCado (aka no s)
is sin. Okay, don’t forget that.
This week in on of my lessons, I said, “Through our Savior Jesus
Christ, we can be clean of fish”. The investigator (the one listening
to my lesson) was very confused and like started to nervous laugh, and
I was just like, “oh no no no, pecados! Pecados!” Anyways, now you all
know and are prepared to teach the doctrine that, “Through the Savior,
we can be clean of sin” :)
But in all seriousnesss, I KNOW that to be true. Our Savior Jesus
Christ suffered for us, and gave himself as a sacrifice for our sins
to meet the demands of justice. Because of Him, we all have the
opprotunity to live with our Heavenly Father again. BUT! It doesn’t
stop there. In order for us to be clean and free of guilt and sadness
about sad mistakes, we have to ACT. We have to have faith in Jesus
Christ and follow his commandments, and be willing and ready to change
our lives and follow Him. It doesn’t take a mere, “sure yeah, I
believe in the Savior”. It takes us striving to be like Him, and
sharing the love with others that he shares with us. We can do that no
matter what our circumstance. As you put forth your very VERY best
effort, Christ recognizes that, and He lifts you up and carries you
the rest of the way.
I know that the gospel of Jesus Christ is true. It has changed my life
and my heart for the best.
I know the Book of Mormon is true. I’ve been trying to read the whole
thing in these 6 weeks, and as I have read it diligently, desiring to
learn and improve, my heart has been filled with love for my Savior
Jesus Christ, even more than before.  The stories in the Book of
Mormon, similiar to the Bible, are stories of people in the Americas
around the same time the people in the Bible lived. The prophets in
the Book of Mormon are like the coolest you’d ever meet. I love their
faith.
The mish is good. Oh so good. I love you all SO much, and think of you often!
 I pray for you more than once a day. More than twice. Even more than 3 times.
God truly does love his children. I know it with all my heart.
Hasta luego!
Hermana Clark

Week 2 pics

FAM-BAM,
Never have I ever loved my bed more. WOW. If you have sleeping
problems, come join me in Lima Peru, and you will be cured for life.
The days here are the very best of my life, and every night I put my
head on my pillow, I am out like a light.
This week went by so fast, holy cow. Again, the days feel like weeks,
and the weeks feel like days. And I think the weeks are just gonna get
faster from here.
This week I got super sick, Thursday and Friday. Okay, let me explain
a very important thing to you all. Everyone here, all the Americans,
are super open about the status of their feces. (aka their poop) The
food here does some wonders to your body, and almost everyone has a
problem, even though it tastes so good. Anyways, “the nuncas”= never,
is code word for constipation, and “the siempres” = always, is code
word for diarehhea. This week I had a bad case of the siempres, ALL
THE TIME. I also threw up for about 24 hours on Thursday, spent more
time in the bathroom on Thursday than I have during the whole mission.
I couldn’t keep food down for almost 48 hours, it was rougher than
rough. But, now that I look back, I feel like I ran a marathon or
something. Like, proud of it for some odd reason, haha.
This week we went to Migraciones to get our visa. It was AWESOME to be
in the city and see all the cute Peruvian people. The Peruvian
drivers. I get a whole lotta grief from people at home about my
driving, but wow, you guys ain’t seen nothing yet. I feel like the
road has no rules, I have a heart attack like every second driving
down the highway. And also, these little vendors walk down the lines
of the lanes in the road and sell drinks!!! It honestly scares the
bejeebies right out of me.
When we went to the bathroom at Migraciones, we stopped and talked to
a woman and her daughter, and they were asking about our tags and
Jesucristo. They spoke in Spanish SO fast, no English whatsoever, and
I’m trying my best to understand/speak. They were so kind, and I just
wanted to give them el libro de Mormon, but I had nothing with me,
because we left our bags in the car. BUT, it gave me hope that there
are so many people out there, ready to hear the gospel, because those
two women were SO ready. I KNOW they were.
Seriously, all the Latinos/Latinas make me feel like a million bucks.
They cheer me up, and make me laugh more than anyone. I love them.
This week, a bunch of members in peru came on a tour through the MTC,
all these little children wearing little tags saying, “future
misionero”. They walked through the classroom we were working in, and
they all came up to me and shook my hand and said, “hola Hermana!” and
then kissed me on the cheek. That’s how everyone greets here, it is
the cutest thing in the world. That was one of the highlights of my
week for sure. I LOVE THE PERUVIANS, have I said that yet?
I also get to play the piano a lot here in the CCM, they ask me to
play for sacrament meetings, and devotionals, and last night, I
accompanied an Elder and an Hermana singing “Come thou Fount”. It was
such a special opportunity for me.
I love praying in Spanish, and this week as I prayed, the word I
prayed in Spanish began to come from my heart. I felt God’s love for
ALL of his children deep down in my heart.
This week we taught our investigator Lisbeth. She’s a teenager who’s
been coming to church with her aunt and uncle for about a year, and
wants to take the lessons. Well, a few nights ago, we had a lesson
with her, ALL in Spanish might I add (that’s how it is everytime), and
I just couldn’t say what I wanted to say in Spanish. I could tell that
Lisbeth was getting really bored, but I just didn’t know what to do
about it, I had NO idea how to say anything in Spanish! Anyways,
finally she literally fell asleep during our lesson, her face in her
hands. I had no idea what to do, so we ended by sharing a scripture
and left. When we left, I was so discouraged. Hermana Haws and I went
and sat down, and I just cried. I didn’t even want to talk about how I
felt, I just silent cried for a minute. This groundskeeper came up to
us, and so I just brushed my tears aside real quick, and put on a
happy face. He talked to us in rapid Spanish, and I didn’t catch much,
but he made me laugh, showed me a video of him playing piano with his
daughter, and before he left, he said in Spanish something to the
effect of, “your mission is good. What you are doing is good”, and at
the end he said, “remember, it is most important to listen” What a
sweet, wise man. I have learned that the language of the spirit
speaking to me is the most important thing to learn here, even more
important than Spanish. Saying what my Heavenly Father would have me
say to his children. Now whenever I see that man here at the CCM, I
say, “hola amigo”, because I really feel he is my friend.
I love my mission already, but I love my savior, Jesus Christ even
more. My love for this gospel has only blossomed since I have been
here. I felt very depressed right after being sick, Satan was just
beating me up, and telling me, “hermana clark, you’re gonna be a
crummy missionary.” Anyways, there’s a phrase that goes, “forget
yourself and go to work”, and when I thought of that before, my mind
said, “really…that’s exhausting”. BUT. As I was thinking more of the
way my savior selflessly served, my heart told me that that phrase was
exactly what I was to do. And I will tell you, never have I ever felt
happier.
I love the mish. It is the hardest thing I have ever done, for sure.
But as I forgotten myself in the service of others, my heart has just
burst with love. I KNOW this church is true.
I love you all, and you are in my Spanish prayers. ALWAYS.
Be of good cheer!
Love, Hermana Clark

First Email- March 15, 2016

Amigos, Amigas, my FAVE peeps in America,
LIMA PERU. GUYS. I’M IN LOVE.
The mish has been the best. Oh my goodness.
There’s so much I want to say, and I’m limited to one hour and the
keyboards here are dificil sometimes, so this letter is going to
bounce around a lil bit. SO EXCITED TO WRITE YOU ALL.
So, I have been here for one week today. But, if we were cavemen, and
had no concept of time, I’d probably tell you that we’ve been here for
about a month. I reread my journal entries from every night (because I
have been a faithful journal keeper now, hehe), and almost every day
says, “Today was the longest day of my life, but the BEST day of my
life”. Haha, it has been a long one. But, when I look back at it, I
think woah, that was a whole week ago?! Whoever said the days are like
weeks and the weeks are like months, AMEN TO THAT.
But, just because the days are long doesn’t mean they aren’t the bomb.
The days are the best. It is so hot and humid here. Every single
shower I’ve taken here has been the coldest the water will go, and for
the whole shower time.
I’m in the CCM for the next 6 weeks, so on the first day, we found out
who our companions would be for the next 6 weeks. Your companion stays
with you at all times. No, I’m serious, at ALL times, the only times
you are by yourself is in the shower, and in the bathroom stall. You
get a little built-in BFF, and I’m SO lucky, because Hermana Haws is
my companion. She is the sweetest, most delightful girl to be around.
She finished nursing school before she came, so she’s 21, and we’re
pretty similar in mannerisms and everything. She is so patient though,
and well, that’s something I’m workin on, so she compliments me just
perfect. She’s from Arizona.
I stay in a dorm-ish room with 6 other girls, 3 from Utah, 1 from
Idaho, then Hermana Haws, and then me. We sleep on bunk beds, and we
have lil closets, and all out shoes go under the bed. We wake up at
6:30 and go to bed at 10:30. ALWAYS. Those are the guidelines we
follow, which doesn’t really affect me because I’m such a morning
person, so no big deal. ;)
Every day is the best. The food here, WOW. Sorry to everyone in the
Provo MTC, we are spoiled in Lima.  La comida es buenisimo, SO good.
Every day I Iove the meals. And, with every meal you always eat
chicken, rice or potatoes. Always. No excpetions. 
One time they made hamburgers because some of the American elders
requested it, and then another time, someone requested pizza. The
pizza was literally a piece of bread with ketchup and sprinkled
cheese. The Peruvian people are so cute, and their effort just made my
heart so warm.
All the missionaries here are on fire, everyone has such a desire to
serve and to be the best that they can, and to share the message of
the gospel with the people of Peru.
Okay, CHOOSE SHOES JUICE. That is my love for the Latinos/Latinas here
in Peru in a sentence. They are probably one of my favorite things
about being here. Every day, we have lunch the same time as the
advanced missionaries, (aka the natives), and I always always always
sit by the Spanish-speakers. They are so funny, because the whole
time, I’m trying to talk to them in Spanish, and they’re trying to
talk to me in English. I am so grateful for when my parents put me in
Spanish classes when I was little, then my two years in high school,
then last semester, because I am always translating for the other
American missionaries to talk to the Latinas. I know that that isn’t
MY abilities though, because I understand far more than what I
thought, and I KNOW that it is all Heavenly Father through the gift of
toungues. So anyways, who knew that English is so hard? The latinos
were asking me the difference of pronunciation for choose, shoes and
juice, and we sat there one day all of lunch talking about it. Also,
they always tell me in Spanish, the men in cusco are very short, so
you won’t be finding your future husband there, hahaha. They are so
hilarious.
Our mission president here is President Moore, along with his wife
Hermana Moore. There´s only about 60 missionaries here, and about 20
of them are English speaking. Anways, becauses there’s so few, we have
the opportunity to know the president personally. Those two are two of
the best people I’ve ever met. I’m serious. I already love them so
much. Their hearts are so full of love for the missionaries.
WE’ve been teaching our first investigator, Luis. Luis has a lot of
family problems, but has some friends who are Mormon, and wants to
know more. We taught him about the Book of >Mormon, and the
restoration of the gospel of Jesus Christ through the prophet Joseph
Smith. He was very receptive to our message, and we asked him to pray
to know if out message was true. Anways, the next time we came back,
we asked, “Luis, will you follow the example of Jesus Christ and be
baptized?”, and he said YES! We were so excited. We asked if he would
pray with us, and he actually offered the prayer. It was so exciting!
Made me so pumped for Cusco. And even though Luis is actually one of
our teachers here, and we just knocked on the door of one of the
little casitas here for practice, it was still cool to teach the
gospel in Spanish.
The mission is just gogogo all the time. We got to hear Lynn G Robbins
speak earlier this week, and that was so awesome. We always wear the
headsets because the meetings are always in Spanish. One thing really
profound that President said at that meeting was, “perhaps the most
important thing that Joseph heard in the Sacred grove was his name.”
(When Heavenly Father says to him, “Joseph, this is my beloved son.
Hear Him!) That hit me so hard. Heavenly Father knows us all
personally and individually. He is aware of each us and our trials,
and struggles, and gosh, he just love us so much.
I was realizing that when I knelt to pray one night. It was one of the
nights that I was really, really missing my family. Especially mom. I
just wanted to call and tell her everything. I love my mom so much. In
my prayers, I was thanking my Heavenly Father for my family and my mom
and how she’s my very best friend. And as I as wanting to call my mom,
I just realized: how wonderful is it that I can still call my Heavenly
Father, and talk to him every night, and every morning, and whenever!
Because that same love I feel from my mom is the kind of love I feel
from my mom is the love I feel from my Heavenly Father, except more
than I can comprehend. He has that love for ALL of his children. I was
just feeling so grateful for prayer this week.
I love the gospel of Jesus Christ. I love my Savior. I know the Book
of Mormon is the word of God, and I’m trying to read the whole thing
again in my 6 weeks here.
I love the mission, and am so grateful for this church. I know that it
is true and real and it changes lives for the better.
Love you all so much. You are always in my prayers. (which are always
said in Spanish)
The church is true.
Thinking of you all!
Love, Hermana Clark

It's not always easy.

1/12/2016

It's 2 o'clock in the morning and I am sitting up in bed. James Taylor is singing to me through my headphones, and I. just. can't. sleep.

I made the decision to serve a mission for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints in this last year. Some people might tell you that this was something I decided years & years ago, when I drew a self portrait of myself in a blue polka dot dress, with a caption that says, "I'm going to serve a mission".  But, to be honest, I didn't even know what that decision meant as a little toothlesss child.

Choosing to serve a mission isn't easy.

As an LDS young adult, sometimes leaving on a mission becomes so romanticized, girls bidding farewell to their "eternal sweethearts" (their boyf's) for two years, cute pinterest going away parties, opening your call with all your family and friends, and the sweet anticipation it brings. I tried to explain the "event" of going on a mission to my friends who aren't Mormon, and if you look at it in a different light, it's a crazy, fun, exciting, but sort-of blown-up ordeal.

I can't even explain how excited I was to open my call. I mean, the next two years of my life awaited me in a 9x11 white envelope. I mean, that's pretty exciting.

I cried tears of joy. The paper inside said, "You are called to serve in Cusco, Peru". I was in shock. If you watch the video of me opening my call, I read, "Cusco, Peru", and I just shake my head. Shake away tears pouring down my face. And then just say, "Yeah...that's cool". I was just totally blown away, it didn't seem real, I had no words.

That day is one of the happiest of my life on record. I felt so full of love and light and joy. Totally on cloud nine. Nothing could bring me down. And I KNEW, (like stronger than anything else I knew) that I was to go to Peru, that God had a special work there for me, and that my life would be changed by the sweet Peruvian people.

But, as time goes on, it gets much harder. That cloud nine feeling, as much as I wish it did, is not how I feel everyday. That initial excitement is still in me, and is taking up a good chunk of my heart. But, the decision has been hard.

I have missed Rexburg a whole bunch. I miss being independent. I miss college nights going out late. I miss talking with my sweet roommates into the late hours of the night. I miss doing what I want. I miss getting to make the decision to go to Taco Tuesday @ Cafe Rio every single Tuesday without fail. I miss singing in the choir. I even miss sitting on my bed against the wall hurriedly typing essays upon essays. I miss complaining about our weird FHE brothers. I miss the bitter cold in Rexburg and wearing my hood tight on my face like a teletubby. I miss the scooter I had for my broken ankle, and scootering class to class. I miss singing and playing ukulele with my roommate. I miss boys asking me for my number. (BYU-Idaho, thanks for that) I miss reading my scriptures in my spot in the gardens on campus every day. I miss my teachers. I miss my ward. I miss my roommates. I miss my friends.  I miss it all a lot.

A lot of days I wish I were in Rexburg instead of living at home, preparing for a mission. Those feelings come with feelings of inadequacy, of not being enough, discouragement and frusteration.

Joseph Smith is one of my heroes. (If you don't know who he is, check out mormon.org :) In the movie Joseph Smith the Prophet, there is a scene where an angry mob comes to Joseph's house. They breaks down his door, with torches and weapons in hand. Emma, Joseph's wife, grabs their baby in the cradle near their bed, and holds the baby close, while silently weeping as Joseph is pulled from his house. The mob grabs Joseph, and outside, they pour hot tar all over his body, and then scatter feathers, covering the entirety of his body, to mock his belief and dedication to the gospel. He is in SO much pain, and Emma stands at the door with the baby, just crying at the sight of his terrible pain. Later, it then shows Joseph sitting on the bed, while Emma picks the feathers out of his skin. Joseph has terrible burns and scabs all over his skin. You can see tears in both of their eyes. And then Joseph says something to the effect of, "Emma, perhaps I am meant to swim in deep waters".

I know that time after time Satan tempted Joseph to give up, to let go, to deny what he knew. He made it so SO hard for Joseph to accomplish the crazy-amazing work that God had for him. It was not easy for Joseph to constantly be standing and defending the gospel of Jesus Christ. He had to literally fight for right. Temptation did not make it easy for him. Satan wants us to be miserable, just like him, and he knew of the goodness the gospel would bring to the world. Why would he want that goodness present? Something that would make so many people SO happy, and full of love, and would make people desire to make the world a better place.

He made it extremely difficult.

Lots of times in my life I feel inadequate. Why has Heavenly Father given me this call to Peru? I feel so overwhelmed and honored, and I want to do so much, but sometimes I feel that even my best effort will not be enough. I feel discouraged. I feel lonely. I feel not enough.

But, through these testing times, I have found so much love and light in my Savior, Jesus Christ. I want to be like the prophet, Joseph. I want to know that I am strong enough to "swim in deep waters", and still stay strong in my faith in Christ and my love of God, just as he did.

I think that Satan tries to make me feel inadequate because he doesn't want me to go to Peru. He doesn't want others to learn of the atonement of Jesus Christ, and how it can heal every pain, and every inadequacy we've felt. He doesn't want me to increase in my love for the Savior. He doesn't want my life (and other's lives) to change for the better.

Joseph Smith later wrote:

And as for the perils which I am called to pass through, they seem but a small thing to me...envy and wrath have been common all the days of my life. God knoweth all these things, whether it be good or bad. But nevertheless, deep water is what I am [meant] to swim in. It all has become a second nature to me; and I feel, like Paul, to glory in tribulation; for to this day has God delivered me out of them all, and will deliver me from henceforth; for behold, and lo, I shall triumph over all my enemies, for God hath spoken it.

And so, whenever I start to feel like I'm missing out on a year of school, and my families lives, hanging out with my friends, or when I worry about all the money I'm putting into this mission, or when I feel like I speak lousy Spanish, I remember: "perhaps I am meant to swim in deep waters"
One last quote from Joseph Smith:

"Never be discouraged. If I were sunk in the lowest pits of Nova Scotia, with the Rocky Mountains piled on me, I would hang on, exercise faith, and keep up good courage, and I would come out on top."

I am so so SO grateful that God has trusted me, Addy Clark, a simple girl from a small community, to represent Him in the country of Peru. I know that faith can take us far.
Keep up the good courage. God is right there, he is the lifeguard watching the deep waters, and his hand is outstretched, if we just reach out to Him. 
I know that he wants to help us, and has our VERY best interest in mind, because he loves us SO stinkin' much. I am grateful for Him and His good word every darned day. 

Pre-spring break/ the week after

April 29, 2015

"Time is moving at the speed of light.
Don't wanna miss this chance, and wish my life away.
These are the BEST days. "
--Beyond 5...(a cute boy band me & Erynn opened for one time)

I like my life. Gee, I like it a lot.
I have been blessed with lots of fun opportunities in the last few months.

Lauren came for the day.Her family was just traveling through, so it was short lived, but it was wonderful. It was awesome to be able to have really good talks with one who valued the same things I do, and with someone who knew about the gospel already, and gave me input on what she thought about our trials of this life.
She is so strong and such a good friend.
And, we took lots of pics with the selfie stick at the park, so that was fun too. :)

Then, Megs had her birthday, which HAD to have multiple festivities. We all went to dinner together, and ate cheesecake (all of our favorites!) and explored downtown. I love this picture a lot, because I love these two a lot. It's pretty representative our friendship. I feel so darned blessed. I have the greatest friends I could ever ask for!

Then, the next day, we went hiking at Bowl & Pitcher (Meg's favorite spot), and Matt came along. We hiked, and then found this cute little meadow area, and sat and chatted, and threw big rocks into the water off the cliff. AND we took lots of pictures with the selfie stick, but that's kind of a given. ;) Then, we went to lunch at this cute place called, "The Milk Bottle" (the building's in the shape of a milk bottle.)



SPRING BREAK 2015
If I write about everything we did, I'll get tired of writing this blog post. So, I'll give my favorite parts.

1. Going to the Grand Canyon.

(and taking this picture, oh my goodness, I loved that too.)

It was beautiful and I am a serious lover of the outdoors.

2. Going to Temple Square during General Conference, AND on Easter. :)

3. Hiking Angel's Landing with my dad & brothers.

Then, the week we got back, I went to State FBLA. I've done a lot with FBLA in my high school career, a lot more than I thought I would've at least, as my Freshman self. FBLA has taught me a lot of important things, most importantly, resumes and job interviews.


Those are just a few fun things that have happened in the last few months.

Love, Addy